Intangibles Qualities Can Contribute to Successes ( Commentary)

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Some people seem to have all the luck. They love what they do every day, they have the respect of their colleagues and the affection of their friends, and the smile on their face couldn’t be bigger. Others want to be on their team – and not just because they succeed more often but because their team truly enjoys working together.

How do these successful people do it? They seem so captivating to the rest of us. Were they born this way, or have they developed an array of engaging attributes through life and work experiences?

Clearly these individuals have assembled a strong portfolio of “intangibles” — critical qualities that have helped them be successful, such as intuitiveness about other people or self-awareness that allows them to read and react to situations. They have a profound sense of their own strengths and weaknesses and work diligently to compensate for the things they have not yet perfected. They have wisely chosen to focus more on others rather than themselves — to have a high self-worth rather than a high self-orientation.

Not surprisingly, these “winners” are in demand, and other companies try to woo them away from their current positions. Many employers are also attempting to help their current employees develop these intangible skills.

There are three things in particular we can learn from individuals with the intangibles and apply to our own behaviors:

• A willingness to share knowledge and continue to learn. These people are smart. There is nothing superficial about them. They are knowledgeable, and they use this knowledge to help others. It’s not used simply to propel them up the rungs of the professional ladder. Instead, they willingly share their expertise, contacts within their network and life’s lessons with anyone they can help. These individuals are more apt to ask “What can I do for you?” rather than “What can you do for me?”

• A genuine interest in people, good with others. These individuals genuinely like other people. They have an uncanny ability to listen to others, they do not interrupt people when they are talking and they give others their full attention. They ask questions and empathize with others, and they are well liked by friends, colleagues and superiors. They smile and make others smile. They remember people’s names and are the first to extend their hand for a handshake. They are warm and even in contentious situations are careful with their words. In addition, they are honest and forthcoming in their communication style.

They attempt to read people’s emotions and facial expressions in order to gauge how others are feeling and reacting to a situation. In times of conflict, these individuals know when to pick up the phone or meet face-to-face rather than sending an email where words can be misconstrued. Even when others are not nice to them, they “rise above the situation” and do their best to “kill them with kindness.”

• Unwavering integrity. Individuals like this are commendable. They have moral fiber and a code of ethics that can never be questioned. You know where they stand, and are not manipulative or malicious. When leading others, they lead by example and are not afraid of “rolling up their sleeves” to get things done. They do not complain, demand or gossip. They follow through and meet deadlines. Simply put, these people are usually quite successful and influential, and we like them because they are not caught up in themselves and their own success. They are focused on us and our success whether we are their client, prospective client, peer, colleague or supervisor.

Having intangible skills helps many individuals finish at the top. Developing these skills is something we can all do no matter where we are in our careers and is an investment that will pay big dividends in the future.

(Blake Woolsey is a co-owner of Executive Communications Consultants LLC, a full-service training and facilitation services company located in Northwest Arkansas. She may be reached at [email protected].)