Our Stories Are Key to Personal Change (I. Barry Goldberg Commentary)

One of my favorite faculty members at Georgetown, an executive coach with a Ph.D. in psychology, was fond of saying, “People can be viewed as a walking bundle of habits and stories.”
Since authentic leadership skills are firmly grounded in our humanity, the impact of our personal stories on the performance of the organizations we lead is a very useful exploration.
The stories we tell ourselves contain the keys to personal change.
The hard part is getting outside our own story enough to hear it.
We all have a story, the one we have told ourselves about who we are in business and in life.
And in general, our relationship to our story is, “That’s my story, and I am sticking to it.”
While a new story does not on its own change business operations, it can remove what is often the most pernicious barrier to growth: the belief that it is not possible.
Here are a few examples of new stories I have seen in the last few years:
A high-tech manufacturer had hit a growth wall.
The company was large enough that the VPs were arguing for more sophisticated forms of management and tracking. The COO’s story was that the company was not yet large enough for such measures.
After months of stagnant performance, two of the VPs moved forward, breaking the COO’s resistance by introducing new forecasting and product development processes.
While he was initially upset, the COO was able to see a new possibility.
Today his story is that the company needs to be more sophisticated in its management models across the board.
The plant manager for a process manufacturer held tightly to the story that because the larger corporation was short-sighted and overly focused on expense controls, there was nothing he could do. The plant operating environment was described by a new plant manager as “abysmal.”
But the new manager’s story was that he was accountable for the environment in the plant and that he would not tolerate the kind of sloppiness, disaffection and poor performance that had been the norm.
Twelve months later, the plant had doubled in output, lowered turnover and increased margins by 12 percent.
The plant manager is not without controversy in the corporate structure since his story often required him to challenge the parent company’s policies. But there is no arguing with the results.
One executive who worked for a family-controlled business was continually frustrated by the short-sightedness of the owner. His story was that he was stuck.
After 20 years in the industry, this was his last job and he had “golden handcuffs.” He would just have to endure it for the four years until he could take his payout and retire.
Then he adopted a new story, one in which his enthusiasm for his work and respect for the organization he served was more important than his old goal of retirement.
It took a matter of weeks to become president of a new, competing organization with big plans for growth.
If the story that I am sticking to is the primary limitation on my performance, then I will likely never test it.
A leader who limits his own company because he or she lives in a small story has no concept of what is truly possible.
In the extreme, negative stories lead to victimhood. I remember working as a peer counselor to Vietnam vets whose story was that they did not have to function in society because they were screwed up in ‘Nam.
As long as they could hide behind that story, nothing more was possible.
I often talk with organizational leaders whose stories are serious limitations to success.
Declaring a new story won’t turn a business into a thriving enterprise. But if the leader’s story is the first obstacle that progress encounters, the organization may never know what is possible.
So, what’s your story?

Part II
Why is it that some stories are almost ubiquitous, pervasive through many cultures and eras? While millions of stories come into being, only a few last through centuries.
Some, such as the Arthurian Grail myths even appear in multiple cultures at the same time. Such powerful myths are not sustained because they are stories we tell ourselves.
The big stories remain with us over generations because they are the stories we need.
In fact, anthropologists argue that myths are invented by people to help them make sense of their lives.
If a story survived centuries, it is because it continues to impart wisdom and practical knowledge to us.
We just need the patience and courage to fully explore the stories.
Last year, Joseph Badaracco, a business ethics professor at Harvard University, published a book using great literature to teach lessons of leadership.
If literature by writers in the last 100 years contains wisdom for modern leaders, then what else could we expect from a story that has lasted for centuries?
I am currently coaching a team of financial services executives in the New York City area. I asked them to read a condensed version of Homer’s “Odyssey” in preparation for a quarterly leadership retreat.
My bankers did not warm to the topic immediately.
There was polite silence and conversation about how interesting it was to reread a classic.
I was beginning to plan my own retreat — from the room.
Finally, one executive offered the opinion that Odysseus was to blame for his troubles. “If he had told his crew what was in the bag he carried away from the Isle of Winds, he would have been home decades sooner.”
Another executive countered, “No, his troubles started before that. His crew was never a disciplined team, and he was off fighting someone else’s war to begin with.”
The following hour was spent exploring how to determine the level of trust to have within an organization about the details of strategy.
Once the bankers became engaged, the exploration continued over two full days as they let Homer help them rethink the context of their own business decisions.
We work in a business environment that wants easy answers.
You can see it in the shelves of any bookstore’s business section. Even the titles broadcast formulas and rules. Authors seem to say, “Just do these five things and everything will be fine.”
But our business challenges are not so formulaic. They ask harder questions and demand more than the short attention span needed to learn the “Five Rules.”
Stories of heroic journeys — either out into the world, up to the seat of gods or down to the afterlife — have endured because they allow us to learn from the struggles.
And because they generally do not preach or pretend to offer easy answers, we must work harder to mine what is there for us in the way of leadership wisdom.
It took a while for a group of hot-shot bankers to warm to epic poetry that is 30 centuries old, but what they took from their discussions will outlast many of the simpler tactics offered up in the latest business best seller.
Since that meeting, I have had groups choose to work with a wide range of stories from an even wider range of cultures. Different stories resonate with different groups, even if they do not know why when the conversation begins.
However, there is one thing that you can trust about the big stories.
If there is a heroic myth that has captured your imagination since you first heard it, that story holds wisdom for you to explore.
Next quarter, my bankers are taking on Orpheus and Sisyphus. So, what’s your story?

(I. Barry Goldberg is managing director of Entelechy Partners, an executive coaching and leadership development firm headquartered in Little Rock. Barry holds an advanced certificate in leadership coaching from Georgetown University. You can reach him at [email protected].)